Saturday, October 22, 2011


The last few days I've been having some pretty crazy dreams that are really realistic. Two nights ago I had a really vivid dream about someone breaking into the house. It freaked me out enough to think about getting a dog. It really got to me, but last night my dreams were worse. I will start with the happier dream. I had a dream that we had two girls. They were either twins or really close in age. That scares the crap out of me!! I really don't want twins. I don't think I could handle it and I don't want kids THAT close in ages. Hopefully it was just a crazy dream that means nothing. My second dream, however, really got to me. We have a friend who's husband was diagnosed with terminal cancer. He was told that he had about a year. Well my other dream last night was of him dying. For me it was really disturbing because it seemed so real. About midmorning this morning I was told her husband passed away. I couldn't believe it. It gave me the chills for almost a hour. Just thinking about it now gives me the chills. I can't remember ever having a dream like that and it being somewhat true. I feel so bad for her and her family. Life is so unfair. This all brings back memories of Stetson. Some friends and I are trying to come up with ways to help her out. All I can think about is how I was when Stetson died. I pretty much closed myself off from the world. All I remember is sleeping the time away. That's all I wanted to do. I look at pictures where I'm smiling and I know they were fake. I can't even remember the holidays during that year. Everything is just blank. I think of my friend and try to imagine how I would be if I lost Matt. I don't know what I would do. I hope she finds some comfort in her family and friends.

1 comment:

  1. Heather I am so so so sorry to hear this... This gave me the chills just reading it. What did he pass away from, was he sick in real life or was it an accident?? I know you went thru such a hard time with stetson leaving us, and i think you may be one of the best people to talk to her about it all because youve lost someone close to you too. all you can do is give ur advice, and if she wants space let her have it. we all grieve differently. love ya girl! congrats on the new baby, i had no idea!